We recently committed “cell phone provider adultery” by leaving Verizon Wireless, whom we have been with almost a decade, and going with their bitter rival, AT&T. The first few months have been an adjustment – new phones, new customer service, and a whole new process to learn. One of the things we did not anticipate in our initial switch was that most of our family still has Verizon as their service provider, so we went over our minutes in our first month because we lost our free mobile to mobile minutes. On the last day of our billing cycle I checked our minute usage and we were already 50 minutes over, which would have incurred more than $20 in overage charges. Maybe that is not a problem for you, but I HATE paying overage charges for anything! On a whim, I contacted AT&T customer service and explained my dilemma and the gentleman was very kind in listening to my predicament. As I was talking, I was thinking, “This guy probably thinks I’m an idiot! There’s no way he is going to respond to my request.” To my surprise, the AT&T customer service representative understood and told me that he would add 200 minutes to my account and that if I didn’t use those extra minutes this month, they would roll over to next month.

I learned something through that process – asking must precede receiving. Without asking, you’ll never receive. Maybe the reason you have not yet received something is because you’ve never asked. “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened” (Matthew 7:7-8).

I’ve been praying for years. I’m not talking about the Ben Stiller, Meet the Parents prayer or the Will Ferrell, Talledaga Nights prayer, but real times of conversation with God. I don’t say that in pride or arrogance, but as someone who has practiced a spiritual discipline consistently, yet has never felt as if I am doing it quite right. Although I’m confident God is listening, I always walk away thinking I should be further developing this habit. Over the last several weeks, I have been in one of my many dry spells which, I believe, plagues every individual who prays. You know what I’m talking about? You begin asking questions such as, “Is God interested in my prayers?” “Is prayer really worth my time?” “Does prayer make a difference?” Instead of giving up, I usually try to push through these desert times and pray anyway. I must admit – sometimes it is difficult to continue on; however, I know it will eventually pass.

This week I decided to be more intentional about my prayers by actually writing them out. It was just what I needed. Seeing the words to my prayers in my own handwriting forced me to see exactly what was near to my heart.

So, it’s time for you to contribute. What things have helped you push through times when God seems distant? What can I do next time I enter a desert moment?

When I was in college I used to spend a lot of time thumbing through The Far Side comic strip collections. I know, I know…I should have been studying, but Gary Larson’s warped sense of humor by using pictures and words seemed to satisfy my appetite for odd humor. If you have ever observed his work, you know what I am talking about. A few days ago, one of his comic strips came to mind (pictured to the left) while I was entering a public bathroom. Upon walking into the men’s restroom (I need to state the obvious for those who may have read an earlier post), an older gentleman was just exiting a stall and walked straight to the exit. For a moment, I stopped and thought (to myself, of course), “Oh no he did not!” Not even a stop at the sink to rinse his hands with water or just maybe an attempt to use a paper towel for some sense of cleanliness. The thing that made it worse was that he was older, probably in his 70′s. I would think by this time in his life he would understand the importance of washing your hands after you use the bathroom. I’m not even talking about “What about Bob?” sanitary habits, but just the basic ones.

Some people look at habits as a bad thing, but I believe habits (some prefer the word disciplines) can also be a good thing. Although washing your hands takes a little extra time, it has benefits for you as well as for others and ultimately prevents the spreading of germs. Developing habits in our faith is also important for our spiritual health as well as for the spiritual health of others. If you are a father, your spiritual health affects your wife and children. If you are an employee, your spiritual health will affect your work ethic. If you are a friend to someone, your spiritual health will affect your example before others. So what are some good, spiritual habits to develop? Disciplines such as reading your Bible consistently, seeking God through prayer and meditation, fellowship with other believers, loving and serving others, and participating financially with local and global ministries are worthy of your time. I’m sure you can think of others to add to the list. Don’t get out of sorts with me and say, “You are just creating a list of rules. Christians have freedom in Christ and from a list of do’s and don’ts.” Remember what Paul said in Philippians 3: “I once thought all these things were so very important, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the priceless gain of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I may have Christ and become one with him.” Go ahead…develop some spiritual habits

…and wash your hands after you use the bathroom.

My six year old daughter loves to write little notes on pieces of paper and leave them for me. She writes cute little girly things like “I love you, daddy” and “hugs and kisses.” Usually when I go out of town, I can expect a note from her saying “I will miss you, daddy” or “I wish you didn’t have to go.” Since we live in an electronically savvy world, Lexi is starting to also get the hang of typing text documents which enhances her communication process. Here is the exact message she left for me in a word document yesterday, “Hi dad . how are you doing ? I love you so much. If you speack tonight do good.i will do 2 speaiel [translated - special] things for you.i love you kkkiiisssssss.” She is a very sweet and thoughtful girl and I hope she stays like that when she is a teenager!While I was away last night on an event, my wife committed the cardinal sin- she taught our daughter how to text message. Having worked in youth ministry for many years, I know that this is a bad habit to start. I know students who send over 10,000 text messages a month! Anyway, I received a text message last night while I was on my way home from the event and it was from Lexi. When I got home she was all giggly and didn’t want to speak to me but only communicate through text messages. After some exchanging of texts, I sent her one that said “go to bed” (since she was up two hours past her bedtime). We usually tuck our kids into bed every night, but last night Lexi did not want me to tuck her in; instead, she declared to my wife “I don’t want daddy to tuck me in…tell him to text me in.” My daughter could not wait until she received each text message from me because she knew that the words represented her daddy who loves her. I hope I love hearing from God as much as my daughter loves hearing from me.

Many moons ago, I used to be quite a bit skinner than I am now. Over the last several months I have come across some “old pictures” and willingly admit that there has been a definite change in my weight. I always laugh it off and chalk it up to getting older and my fast-paced lifestyle. If I can be transparent for a minute, I really would like to shed a few of those extra pounds because I know that maintaining a healthy weight will contribute to my overall quality of life. There have even been a couple times over the last several years that I have actually taken steps to lose weight; however, each time I find myself slipping right back into bad habits. So, I decided to contact Richard Simmons and he has agreed to be my personal trainer for the next six months. Just kidding. I know you would have been jealous. I’ve asked myself over and over, “why can’t I change this evident problem?” Each time I arrive at numerous conclusions about my repeated failures. First, I have deceived myself into thinking I am fine especially when I compare myself to others. Secondly, I believe I can handle things on my own without the help of others. Last, I know I will just fail again. These excuses are deja vu because they are the same ones we use concerning spiritual transformation. We think everything is fine the way it is. We don’t want to admit our helplessness to God or even enlist others to support us in our spiritual journey. We quit trying to change because we are certain of looming failure right around the corner. What causes us to buy into these lies? Wrong thinking. If God’s Word shapes our thinking, we will stop comparing ourselves to others and God will be our example for living. God’s Word will then expose our helplessness and drive us to our knees in prayer. This recognition will also cause us to be transparent with others and ask for their accountability in our daily attitudes and actions. The last lie is a little more complicated to defeat because failure is a constant struggle for the follower of Christ. Although failure is inevitable, we should never give up or retreat. We must be brave enough to face these struggles head on and depend on God to provide the strength for us to endure. Maybe you have quit trying to change because of so many failed attempts. Pick up the pieces and start again. The writer in Proverbs reminds us that “a righteous man may fall seven times and rise again…” (Proverbs 24:16).

There are many things which I consider to be painful, but only a few circumstances in life compare with the anguish I encountered a few weeks ago. I know what you may be thinking – broken bone or a root canal. Although I have had the unfortunate opportunity to experience both of these situations, my distress was not the result of a physical occurrence but rather something you would probably consider normal – a trip to the photographer. Some of you do not understand my feelings of pain because you love having your picture taken, but I think many more of you can identify with my situation. When I arrived at the photographer, I was greeted by a very friendly woman who directed me to a waiting room. This area was not your typical room…it was space with a very large mirror. She told me to make sure I looked my best before being photographed. Now, unless there were surgical tools in the drawers of that room, nothing was going to change my appearance at this point. For the next few minutes, I sat in front of that mirror hoping this would be over soon. What is it about having a picture taken or looking into a mirror which makes us cringe? I am not a psychologist, but I tend to think it has something to do with the fact that many individuals do not like what they see. A mirror or a picture exposes the real you.The writer James compares the Bible to a mirror (James 1:21-27). Rather than reflecting our physical appearance, it accurately reflects our spiritual condition. Instead of revealing physical blemishes and flaws, it manifests every area where we fall short of God’s standard of righteousness. Timothy adds that the Bible is beneficial “for doctrine [what is right], for reproof [what is wrong], for correction [how to adjust wrong behavior], for instruction in righteousness [how to sustain good conduct].” Take some time today to look into God’s mirror, the Bible. Although it will accurately expose the real you, it will also provide direction for living life the way God intended.

I really struggle with being a parent. Don’t get me wrong…I love being a parent and I love my kids with all my heart, but I often wonder if I am making the right decisions as a parent. Am I being too strict? Am I being to lenient? Am I allowing them to eat too much junk food? Am I setting the proper boundaries for them? Am I protecting them from harmful influences? Do they know I love them? Do they think I am a good dad? I could go on. I guess I feel so insecure as a parent because I know I am not perfect. How can I set the right example for my kids when there are so many things in me that need to change? I guess when I think about it, I feel the same way as a pastor. Am I setting the right example for my people? Do they know I care? Am I giving them the right content? If I am honest, I feel the same way as a husband. Does she know she means more to me than any other woman in the world? Am I providing the security she needs? Does she get the respect from me that she deserves? Since I am being transparent, I also struggle with being a follower of Christ. Does God know I love Him? Does He think I am an obedient child? Is He disappointed when I do wrong? Insecurity seems to be prevalent in most of our relationships, quickly leading to discouragement and defeat. So, what do we do when we feel we don’t measure up? How do we react when we know we may have failed as a dad, a husband, an employee, and as a follower of Christ? We must realize that we will never measure up…we will never be perfect…we will never have it all together. Maybe that is not what you thought you would hear, but it is true. Inadequacy and insecurity will plague us for the rest of our life. So, do we just give up and quit trying to be the right kind of person? No. When we finally realize that we cannot measure up on our own, we are ready to allow God to live through us. Paul writes to the church at Ephesus regarding this matter. “Do not be drunk with wine…but be filled with the Spirit” (Ephesians 5:18). A person who is drunk with wine is not acting like themselves, but is being controlled by the alcohol…Paul says not to do this. But rather a follower of Christ should be filled with God so that He controls your actions and not yourself. When we give God control over our attitudes, actions, and reactions it enhances all the relationships we have. Read Ephesians 5:15-6:9…He changes everything!

As I have mentioned in a previous blog, our entire family was sick for a week in March. Arrogantly, I had commented to someone a few weeks earlier that our family had avoided being sick during the winter months…I even knocked on wood when I said it, but the flu made an unwanted visit to our home. The thing I hate about being sick is that it usually comes without warning and leaves no time to rearrange schedules. One day I was feeling fine and the next day I was in the doctor’s office reading a fishing magazine! I’m not sure about you, but when I get sick I’ll do anything to feel better, including going to the doctor, taking medications whose names I cannot pronounce, and shelling out insane amounts of money. No one wants to be sick but I assume most individuals would go to great efforts to be made well. The question must be asked: “Why will we take any measure necessary to secure physical health but ignore our spiritual health?” There is a writing in the book of Proverbs which says “keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life.” The writer is giving a warning to guard the heart (the center of all our passions and desires) because the things we allow to captivate it will be reflected in our attitudes and actions. If the heart and mind are being saturated with the ideologies and philosophies of the world, improper attitudes and actions will follow. In case you are misunderstanding the value system of the world, the Apostle John gives us a solid definition of the world‘s character: lust of the flesh (desire for evil), lust of the eyes (unquenchable passion to have more), and the pride of life (thinking highly of self). If you are like me, I get caught up in the world’s system quite a bit, sometimes without even recognizing it. I find myself drawn to evil, wanting more, and thinking I‘ve got it all figured out when in reality I have failed to guard my heart. How do I guard my heart? Well, I’m kind of old-school on this stuff but I firmly believe we guard our hearts through reading Scripture, meditating on it, and surrendering to God by talking to Him (Psalm 1). When we make the Bible a regular part of our routine, it allows us to understand truth and righteousness. When Paul writes to Timothy he reminds him that all Scripture is beneficial for doctrine (what is right), for reproof (what is wrong), for correction (how to get it right), and instruction in righteousness (how to keep it right). The writer James compares the Bible to a mirror which exposes the true health of our soul (James 1:21-27). As the Bible reveals the truth about our spiritual health, we must learn to surrender our selfish desires in order to follow God’s ways – the two cannot co-exist. The discipline of prayer is evidence that we are completely dependent on God and an admission that we cannot do life on our own. Maybe it is time for a spiritual check-up…