August 25, 2011 in
Funny Stories, Judging, Relationships, True Stories with
For as long as I can remember, I have had an ongoing battle with the squirrels in our backyard. Before I say what I am going to say next, I must make it clear that I love all animals except maybe snakes, alligators, or anything that stings or has the potential to kill me in an instant. Having said that, I find the squirrels in my backyard very annoying because they attempt to steal the seed I have specifically placed in the feeders for the birds. In my opinion, the nuts that fall from the trees are meant for the squirrels and the seed is intended for the birds. When I first purchased a bird-feeder, it was located very close to a tree and the squirrels would jump from the tree to the feeder and eat all the seed. That’s where the war started. Since the thieving squirrels began to rob the birds of their seed, I have been looking for ways to keep them away. After tireless research, I found the perfect solution and the birds have been able to enjoy their seed without the hoarding squirrels around to loot it.
I thought the battle was over until I caught a squirrel trying to weasel himself (or herself) down to the feeder. I was ticked. I actually got out my phone and snapped a few pictures of the evil creature as it made its’ way down the pole. I don’t own a gun so I use my camera. Go figure. My first thought was to bang my fist on the window and scare the little violator, but I decided to watch and hope for the squirrel’s demise. I also started to videotape the incident. It was perfect timing because I was able to personally witness and document the squirrel falling off of the bird-feeder onto the ground. For some odd reason, I found the failure of the squirrel satisfying. Although the squirrel incident makes me appear evil, what concerns me even more is when I hope for the demise of another person or organization. Have you ever caught yourself secretly hoping to see someone or something fail…your boss at work, the new church in your community, your sister who gets all the attention, the president, the business competition, or the friend who seems to have everything. Since when is it acceptable to wish evil on others?
Hoping for failure in others reveals that we have already failed.
Do you want to see the actual footage of the squirrel falling? Click here to view.
March 16, 2011 in
Funny Stories, Relationships, True Stories with
I was sitting at a red light minding my own business when suddenly someone honked their car horn. Since I live in a small city, horn honking is not common except for major infractions. Personally, I use my horn sparingly for fear of being shot or beat up. Upon hearing the horn honk, the guy directly in front of me immediately looked in his rear-view mirror not just once, but several times. He thought it was me. To make matters worse, the guy was driving an old pick-up truck. Luckily, there was no gun rack or bumper sticker reading, “Honk if You Want to Meet Jesus!” I wasn’t sure what I needed to do to clear my name or let the guy know that it was not me who honked. He continued to stare me down in his rear-view mirror until the light turned green and he sped away. The phantom honker was never discovered and there is a guy driving around my city in an old pick-up who thinks I honked at him.
Unfortunately, all of us know how it feels to be falsely accused. The immediate response is usually to defend ourselves or personally attack those who are blaming us; however, sometimes it is best to just walk away. Jesus was often falsely accused but He chose to walk away. Instead of firing back, He stepped back.
October 20, 2010 in
Anger, Christians, Relationships, Speech, Thoughts with
There are few things that feel better than unleashing a tirade of words on someone who annoys you, especially when they have pushed you over the edge. For some reason, we believe angry words will cause the other person to compromise, back down, or even apologize; however, harsh words often cause further tension between two individuals. Unfortunately, words said in anger can permanently damage a relationship, which can also affect friends and family close to the situation. Unkind words leave ugly scars.
Those who claim to follow Christ are accountable for the words they speak and should carefully guard what they say because spoken words reflect what is in the heart. Rather than fighting angry words with more angry words, the writer of Proverbs challenges his readers to react with a “soft answer,” which deflects anger (Proverbs 15:1).
Angry words bring destruction, but well-spoken words bring peace.
October 6, 2010 in
Anger, Attitude, Relationship with God, Relationships, Thoughts, True Stories with
Although I am 37 years old, I can still remember a few spankings I deservedly received during my younger days. I was the type of kid who started crying before I ever got the spanking because the anticipation was so overwhelming. Usually swift discipline quickly put me back on the straight and narrow; however, with each passing year I noticed myself beginning to resent the correction of my parents and those in authority. Every time an authority figure exposed a behavior issue, I would outwardly adjust my actions, but inwardly I was angry…angry that someone else was telling me that I was wrong.
Let’s be honest. Who likes their boss correcting them in a company meeting? Who enjoys a spiritual mentor pointing out areas that need to be changed? What child happily receives chastisement from their parents? Who can abstain from offense when the Pastor preaches against your sin? What type of person can accept honest feedback from caring friends? Who finds it easy to love God when He permits consequences for wrongdoing? Although discipline is difficult to embrace, those who respond properly will live a life of righteousness. The writer of Hebrews pens these beautiful words, “No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way” (Hebrews 12:11).
If someone cares about you enough you to correct you, be glad. A proper response to correction can prevent future consequences.
September 28, 2010 in
Anger, Attitude, Character, Funny Stories, Loving Others, Relationships, True Stories with
A couple weeks ago I was leaving Panera, one of my favorite places to eat, and there was a guy crossing into the parking lot right ahead of me. Although the parking lot is a highly trafficked area, most drivers will stop for pedestrians…most of them. As the guy in front of me headed to his car, a young driver decided that he wasn’t going to let him cross over in front of him. They exchanged dirty looks and then the guy walking decided he was going to cross the street in front of this driver no matter what. As the young man crossed in front of the car, he looked directly into the eyes of the driver and gave him a “one finger salute.” I watched the entire scenario as if it were in slow motion.
Those types of occurrences don’t shock me, but they do leave me a little frustrated. What was to be gained through that brief conflict? As far as I can tell, nothing. Although conflict is inevitable in everyday life, we can choose how we respond. Many times we feel a need for personal retaliation when our so-called “rights” have been violated. A smart remark, a dirty look, a word of gossip, or personal attacks top our lists when someone crosses us the wrong way, but is that God’s standard of conduct? In His Sermon on the Mount, Jesus throws out a couple words we might overlook if we don’t read carefully, “But I say, do not resist an evil person! If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also” (Matthew 5:39). Jesus commands His followers to turn the other way instead of seeking revenge on those who have offended us.
Retaliating is natural. Pardoning is supernatural. Revenge may be our human reaction, but release is our divine responsibility.
September 23, 2010 in
Marriage, Readiness, Relationships, Reputation, Sin, Temptation, Thoughts, Weakness with
There is a sexually explicit story written by Solomon in Proverbs 7 which stars a naive young man and a prostitute. I don’t remember this one being told in my Children’s Bible Story Book. The story goes something like this. There was a young man who lacked common sense (7:7), so he decided to walk down a street known to house a prostitute (7:8-9). Dressed in a seductive outfit (7:10), the woman came out to meet the young man and greeted him with an embrace and a kiss (7:13). I’m sure he liked it. The woman flattered the youth by saying that she had been trying to find him and that he was the ONE for whom she had been looking (7:15). She was lying. She begins to describe in detail the bed that was awaiting them, how they could “drink their fill of love until morning,” and enjoy each others’ caresses (7:16-18). The immoral woman even put the young man at ease by assuring him that her husband had gone away on a long trip and would not return until later in the month (7:19-20). He couldn’t resist her scintillating words, so he gave into her advances (7:21). Solomon writes, “He followed her at once, like an ox going to the slaughter. He was like a stag caught in a trap, awaiting the arrow that would pierce its heart. He was like a bird flying into a snare, little knowing it would cost him his life” (7:22-23). Although these words were written thousands of years ago, this same scenario plays itself out in lives everyday. The characters may be different and the story may vary, but the process of temptation is the same for all. Temptation leads to lust. Lust leads to sin. Sin eventually leads to death (James 1:14-15).
In my mind, this young man made an avoidable mistake, which ultimately led to his sin. His mistake is found in Proverbs 7:8, “He was crossing the street near the house of an immoral woman, strolling down the path by her house.” He knew she lived there. Everyone knew where she lived.
If you want to keep yourself from walking into sin, you might want to quit frequenting the road of temptation.
August 30, 2010 in
Funny Stories, Relationships, True Stories with
I have never been a handy man and I probably never will be. Perfect example. Saturday afternoon was supposed to be a time of rest, but my plans quickly changed after our bathtub spout came apart leaving us without the ability to take a shower. I immediately picked up the phone and called my dad, who lives 500 miles away, and he gave me some instructions. Take off the broken piece, take it to Lowe’s, and find someone who can get you the right replacement piece. After returning from Lowe’s with the proper piece, I could not get it to fit. Frustration set in and I warned everyone to stay far away unless they wanted to see me go postal.
I put in another call to a friend who is a local plumber and he also gave me some instructions. Return to Lowe’s and make sure you have the right part. Another visit to Lowe’s proved that I had purchased the right part. The guy at Lowe’s had his own advice for me and suggested that I allow my wife to try replacing the spout. I punched him right in the face (I imagined that part). Upon arriving home, I tried again and again and again to get that stupid piece to fit, but with each attempt I realized that I was meant to spend my Saturday afternoon kneeling over the side of my bathtub. In desperation I called my plumber friend, so he stopped over and fixed it in ten minutes.
Needless to say, I learned a very valuable lesson. Surround yourself with people who are gifted in ways you are not.
August 27, 2009 in
Attitude, Determination, Failure, Funny Stories, Perspective, Relationships, True Stories, Value with
Here in Ohio we have trash stalkers, at least that is what I call them. Trash stalkers are people who spend their evenings/nights stealthily cruising through neighborhoods on the eve of trash day in hopes of finding treasure in someone else’s curbside junk. On more than one occasion, I have personally spoken to one of these stalkers because there must be an unwritten rule that if they get caught digging through your trash, they must ask for permission to assume ownership of it. They typically say something like, “Is it okay with you if I take this?” Since I have an insatiable desire for sarcasm, I am tempted to respond by saying, “No you can’t. That tricycle with only one wheel is going to be used for a lawn ornament.” In reality though, I usually panic when they stop at my house thinking that I possibly trashed something of unrecognizable value or maybe the mirror I am tossing out contains an original copy of the Declaration of Independence behind the glass. I really do not want to end up in national headlines as the idiot who threw away thousands of dollars in his trash because he was blind to an item’s true value.After spending more than a decade investing in the lives of others, I’m convinced that many people are guilty of throwing away things which they no longer view as valuable, even though it still holds great value; although, I do realize that some repair may be needed to restore full value to certain things. Most of the time, something which was once valuable only became trash because of improper care.
August 26, 2009 in
Attitude, Determination, Failure, Family, Funny Stories, Leadership, Perspective, Relationships, Transition, Trials, True Stories, Weakness with
Yesterday I took my two kids on a bike ride because, well, it is our new favorite thing to do and I believe they enjoying spending some time with me as much as I enjoy spending time with them. Now every day when I get home from work, both my son and daughter beg me to take another bike ride. So yesterday, instead of traveling the normal route around our neighborhood, I decided to take them on a new, exciting adventure in order to explore the unknown – the woods. Hoping there would be a decent bicycle path amongst the tall trees near our house, all three of us set out on an adventure; however, my children had no idea what I had planned. As we approached the deep, dark forest my seven and nine year old became a little concerned about entering a place where they had never been; in fact, they objected and made statements like, “I don’t want to go in there.” I assured them that there had been no recent snake attacks in our area, so we finally proceeded into the canopy of trees. After only traveling a short distance, the trail ended so we backtracked and took a side trail I had spotted several yards back, which ended up leading to another dead end. Determined to find a clear path, I led us along the edge of the trees until we had descended down a hill where we were met with yet another dead end. By this time, my kids were clearly frustrated with me and at one point, my daughter (who is always brutally honest) put her bike down on the ground and said, “I’m tired and I want to go home NOW!” I knew it was time to abandon my plan for discovery and exploration. Dejected and a little frustrated that my plan for exploring new paths had failed, we all pedaled home. Based on yesterday’s failure, I was certain that they would not want to embark on another bicycle journey; however, when I arrived home this evening, they asked if we were going on a bike ride.
Has the person who is your leader (a boss, teacher, parent, or pastor) led your business, classmates, family, or church to several dead ends? If so, maybe he or she needs you to ask to go on another bike ride.
August 20, 2009 in
Funny Stories, Judging, Life, Relationships, Speech, True Stories with
Since both of my kids have learned to ride their bikes this summer, I have been in search of a bike for myself so I can ride with them. In the meantime, I have been riding an electric scooter that requires me to push with one of my feet because the battery alone is not powerful enough to go up hills, even small ones. I’m pretty sure…let me rephrase that…I’m confident that a thirty-five year old man looks ridiculous riding a scooter; in fact, I caught a few people who saw me riding the scooter and ran inside their house in order to bring other family members outside to see the old guy on the scooter. Maybe I need to join the circus. I really didn’t care what everyone else thought about me because my kids thought I was really cool; of course, they don’t know any better, yet. After riding for a while, two middle school boys passed by us riding their bikes and looking at me they said, “Nice scooter. I wish I had one like that!” They rode away laughing. In the back of my mind I was thinking, “Listen, you little boys whose voices haven’t changed and whose armpits haven’t grown one hair yet. I’ll run over you with this scooter…if I can catch up with you!” For some reason, I allowed their snide comment to bother me.
It’s astounding how quickly we can be negatively affected by the comments of people who don’t really know us, barely know us, or don’t care about us. A judgmental word in passing, a controversial comment on your blog, an anonymous letter, or a criticizing e-mail can cause a person to re-examine his choices or even lose hope.
The voice which speaks only in passing is a voice which should be passed by.
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