Tom Hogsed » Speech

Do You Speak with an Accent?

Tom Hogsed — Tue, 05 Apr 2011 20:33:02 +0000

Spring break took us south to North Carolina…home of sweet tea, NASCAR, and southern hospitality. Since my parents and both brothers live in North Carolina, we end up making the trek there once a year. North Carolina has not been my home since 1992 so each time we return I find myself listening to people talk. I like their accents, but my British wife is not a big fan of the southern drawl. It’s a matter of taste. I used to talk just like the people in the south, that is, until I moved away to Florida for 6 years of college and then spent the last 13 years in Ohio. Ohioans don’t have accents so I have gradually lost mine and all distinctiveness has disappeared from my life. I guess I talk normal now. Every once in a while I will meet someone in Ohio and immediately know that they immigrated from the south. The way the person talks gives it away every time!

What does the way you talk reveal about you?

“A fool is quick-tempered, but a wise person stays calm when insulted. An honest witness tells the truth; a false witness tells lies. Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing” (Proverbs 12:16-18, NLT).

Save the Drama for Your Mama

Tom Hogsed — Mon, 04 Apr 2011 20:16:16 +0000

On our way home from church last night, we stopped at a red light and my kids began making faces at the person in the car next to us. I was praying that it was someone from church, but when I asked if they knew who it was they responded, “I don’t know.” I knew I should have spent the extra couple hundred dollars to have my windows tinted! I immediately went into “fatherly mode” and warned them of the dangers of making faces at people they do not know. Rather than simply explaining why we don’t make funny faces at unfamiliar people, I over dramatized the scenario and chose a far-fetched illustration that went something like this: “We don’t make faces at people we don’t know because some people may pull out a gun and shoot at us!” They thought my story was dumb and my son told me that he could dodge the bullet. Although there are people in our world whose road rage may cause them to act out in violence, most people are reasonable. There was no need for me to over-dramatize the situation.

Our world is full of drama and, at times, thrives on drama. It amazes me how quickly situations can escalate because somebody added a little drama to a possible outcome. Just watch the 24 hour news channels. Drama. Listen to office gossip. Drama. Speculate on a family situation. Drama.

Rather than contributing to the noise, use your words wisely. Drama only creates more drama.

“In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself” (James 3:5-6)

Why Don’t You Shut Up!

Tom Hogsed — Wed, 20 Oct 2010 04:01:20 +0000

There are few things that feel better than unleashing a tirade of words on someone who annoys you, especially when they have pushed you over the edge. For some reason, we believe angry words will cause the other person to compromise, back down, or even apologize; however, harsh words often cause further tension between two individuals. Unfortunately, words said in anger can permanently damage a relationship, which can also affect friends and family close to the situation. Unkind words leave ugly scars.

Those who claim to follow Christ are accountable for the words they speak and should carefully guard what they say because spoken words reflect what is in the heart. Rather than fighting angry words with more angry words, the writer of Proverbs challenges his readers to react with a “soft answer,” which deflects anger (Proverbs 15:1).

Angry words bring destruction, but well-spoken words bring peace.

Words with Friends

Tom Hogsed — Thu, 26 Aug 2010 11:40:39 +0000

Sometimes the small things in life make the difference. This is especially true when it relates to the words we speak, whether they are kind or unkind. A few unkind words can cause lifelong hurt, but a word of compliment or encouragement can renew a person’s spirit. There is great power in your words. Proverbs 12:25 says, “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down but a good word makes him glad.”

I want to make a challenge to you right now. Make a person glad today by saying a few words of kindness. Pick up the phone and call your wife. Send a Facebook message to the friend who has been experiencing hard times. Walk out of your office and go thank a co-worker for something they have done. Text a family member and let them know how much they mean to you. Write a special note and drop it in your child’s lunchbox. Leave your Pastor a voicemail letting him know that he is doing a great work in the church.

You have the opportunity to make a difference in a person’s life by speaking words of kindness. Kind words will not cost you anything, but they may be the most valuable thing a person receives today.

How have kind words made a difference in your life?

Do NOT Listen to This Person!

Tom Hogsed — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 05:01:00 +0000

Since both of my kids have learned to ride their bikes this summer, I have been in search of a bike for myself so I can ride with them. In the meantime, I have been riding an electric scooter that requires me to push with one of my feet because the battery alone is not powerful enough to go up hills, even small ones. I’m pretty sure…let me rephrase that…I’m confident that a thirty-five year old man looks ridiculous riding a scooter; in fact, I caught a few people who saw me riding the scooter and ran inside their house in order to bring other family members outside to see the old guy on the scooter. Maybe I need to join the circus. I really didn’t care what everyone else thought about me because my kids thought I was really cool; of course, they don’t know any better, yet. After riding for a while, two middle school boys passed by us riding their bikes and looking at me they said, “Nice scooter. I wish I had one like that!” They rode away laughing. In the back of my mind I was thinking, “Listen, you little boys whose voices haven’t changed and whose armpits haven’t grown one hair yet. I’ll run over you with this scooter…if I can catch up with you!” For some reason, I allowed their snide comment to bother me.

It’s astounding how quickly we can be negatively affected by the comments of people who don’t really know us, barely know us, or don’t care about us. A judgmental word in passing, a controversial comment on your blog, an anonymous letter, or a criticizing e-mail can cause a person to re-examine his choices or even lose hope.

The voice which speaks only in passing is a voice which should be passed by.

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A Mouthful

Tom Hogsed — Tue, 26 May 2009 05:01:00 +0000

Saturday was zoo day for our family as we trekked about an hour north to Cleveland, Ohio. It has been several years since we’ve visited the Cleveland Metroparks Zoo, so we were all looking forward to some interaction with the creatures awaiting us. My personal favorite animals are the giraffes and the orangutans. About an hour and a half into the visit, my daughter started whining about a blister which had formed on her heel. I think it was my fault because I told her she could wear her crocs, but I later discovered that Leah had instructed her to wear tennis shoes. This drama cut our trip a little short, so we made a quick visit to the rain forest and then headed to the car. I thought the extreme drama had been averted for the day, but I was wrong.

For years I have had bad breathing habits. I’m not a doctor (although I have access to webMD), but I think healthy breathing is supposed to be “in through your nose and out through your mouth,” but I usually breathe exclusively through my mouth. Normally, leaving my mouth hanging open to sustain life does not cause any issues, until Saturday. I was in the midst of taking a deep breath in and all of the sudden I felt some type of flying insect hit the back of my throat. Before the choking started, I thought, “I hope the bug in my mouth did not just fly off of a fresh patty.” After that fleeting thought, I began coughing like a chain-smoker. Of course my wife is like, “What’s wrong?” I could barely make out words, but eventually alerted her to the fact that I had just ingested a character from “A Bug’s Life.” Coughing and gasping for breath, I finally made it to the car and the kids graciously gave me some of their water…I didn’t even care about the backwash and floaties at this point. Thinking that the water had taken care of the problem, I drove away from the zoo and made my way to the highway. I was wrong. The bug must have been fighting for dear life because I started coughing uncontrollably and was close to throwing up – BIG TIME. By this time, my kids were fighting in the backseat of the car and I could not even yell at them. I guess throwing up would have gotten their attention. Expecting some compassion from my wife, I looked over and she was clutching her chest as she mumbled, “You’re making me sick.” Great! I’ve always wondered what “synchronized projectile vomit” looks like.

Eventually, I was able to get everything under control and we made it home, but even though the immediate incident had passed, my throat continued to hurt for the next 24 hours. Oh well, maybe next time I’ll learn to keep my mouth shut. Bugs or not, I need to practice closing my mouth more often.

For Those Who Can't Keep Their Mouth Shut…

Tom Hogsed — Sun, 28 Dec 2008 13:54:00 +0000

Mostly because I am idiot, I decided to go shopping the day after Christmas. The tree had yielded a couple gift cards for me, so I figured I should spend them before all the stores shut down (have you received that forwarded e-mail yet?). One of the stores was located in our local shopping mall and I must say that it was crowded…very crowded. Before even entering the mall, I had to vigorously fight the cars in the parking lot for a space. I cut a few people off and scored a spot. So much for post-Christmas cheer! Upon walking through the doors I discovered shoppers everywhere looking to land a bargain so I quickened my pace to the men’s section where shirts were less than five dollars…and no, I was not in Goodwill. After swiping up a few items I rushed to the checkout and began waiting in a line with about four people in front of me. In my best estimation, the wait was about ten minutes. When it was my turn to check out, the cashier started talking to another employee about taking a lunch. It seems she was long overdue because of the constant lines. She started closing out her register and I assumed that meant I would need to get in another line. Usually I can keep my mouth shut in this type of situation, but something inside told me to speak up. Without thinking I said, “Does this mean I have to get in another line?” I felt like I was trying to say it nice, but the words were more harsh than I intended. As the words were leaving my mouth, I saw another cashier stepping up to the register to take this woman’s place. Man, I wish I could have taken those words back!

“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer” (Psalm 19:14).